{"title":"Innermon Species File Collection","description":null,"products":[{"product_id":"stay-unbothered-snail-species-file-mug-funny-office-mug-11oz","title":"Stay Unbothered Snail Species File Mug – Funny Office Mug, 11oz","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis two-sided 11oz white ceramic mug has Corporate Snail on one side and its Species File on the other. It is a funny Secret Santa gift idea for a coworker, with free US shipping.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eYou still have responsibilities. You just don't have to react to everything.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eCarry the shell. Protect the space inside it.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWork comes with weight.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eDeadlines. Emails. Meetings. Expectations.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eResponsibilities you cannot simply leave behind because, unfortunately, you are still employed.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMeet the Corporate Snail.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSnail does not escape responsibility. The shell comes with the job.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBut the shell is also something else. It is a small space of its own — somewhere to pull back, reset, and decide what actually deserves a reaction.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eOne side of this two-sided 11oz mug features the Innermon Snail, coffee in hand and shell firmly attached.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eTurn it around for the official Species File:\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCarries more responsibility than structurally recommended.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eStatus: Still unbothered.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eStay Unbothered does not mean stop caring. It does not mean stop doing the work.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIt means learning to move through the corporate environment without letting every email, meeting, comment, request, or minor emergency take up permanent space in your head.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eCarry the shell. Do what needs to be done. Retreat when necessary.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThen keep moving.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePart of the Innermon Species File Collection, a growing archive of the species found surviving modern office life.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eProduct highlights\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eTwo-sided Species File design — Corporate Snail artwork on one side and its official diagnosis on the other.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eOriginal hand-drawn Innermon Snail illustration.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e11oz white ceramic office mug.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDesigned around the Innermon philosophy: Stay Unbothered.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eA reminder to carry your responsibilities without carrying every reaction with them.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMade for office desks, work-from-home spaces, coffee breaks, and people protecting a little peace inside the workday.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eA thoughtful funny gift for coworkers, work besties, friends, or anyone navigating office life.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePart of the Innermon Species File Collection.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSold individually: one 11oz mug. Gallery images show both sides of the same mug; scene props are not included.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"11oz","offer_id":53450985898351,"sku":"32790291716898206924","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0965\/5468\/0687\/files\/01_snail_character_hero_v01.jpg?v=1788924537"},{"product_id":"stay-unbothered-snail-t-shirt-office-humor-graphic-tee","title":"Stay Unbothered Snail T-Shirt — Office Humor Graphic Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis 100% Airlume cotton graphic tee features Corporate Snail’s “Stay Unbothered” front print and is available in White, Black, Natural, or Navy in sizes S–3XL. It is a funny Secret Santa gift idea for a coworker, with free US shipping.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eYou still have responsibilities. You just don't have to react to everything.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eCarry the shell. Protect the space inside it.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe Innermon Snail carries the responsibilities that come with work — and a small space to retreat when the office gets too loud.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThis front-print graphic tee pairs our coffee-holding Snail with \u003cstrong\u003eStay Unbothered\u003c\/strong\u003e: a reminder to keep doing what matters without giving every interruption a permanent place in your head.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eNot about doing less. About letting less get to you.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eProduct details\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront-only graphic print.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eBella+Canvas 3001 blank with a retail fit, side seams, shoulder tape, and tear-away label.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton; solid color, not heather.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront DTG print workflow.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAvailable in White, Natural, Black, and Navy.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSizes S, M, L, XL, 2XL, and 3XL.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003ch3\u003eSize guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cp\u003eMeasurements are garment dimensions laid flat. 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Same shell. Selective engagement.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":53450996416879,"sku":"31405328447453518843","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ S","offer_id":53450996449647,"sku":"26122239350258863769","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":53450996482415,"sku":"22561385215319526435","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":53450996515183,"sku":"91294016839367287193","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":53450996547951,"sku":"59551812148495441843","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ M","offer_id":53450996580719,"sku":"23026768897299406141","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":53450996613487,"sku":"28441116627666927031","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":53450996646255,"sku":"21290273902473212042","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":53450996679023,"sku":"31444517066801782088","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ L","offer_id":53450996711791,"sku":"32421079233299264764","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":53450996744559,"sku":"19366611197707757622","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":53450996777327,"sku":"26188814569240038940","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":53450996810095,"sku":"26811645450395958760","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ XL","offer_id":53450996842863,"sku":"18872170157997728221","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":53450996875631,"sku":"24576058900166275480","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":53450996908399,"sku":"28837182983110183679","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":53450996941167,"sku":"89808757676734017726","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ 2XL","offer_id":53450996973935,"sku":"15540767564237291574","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":53450997006703,"sku":"24562116631188521332","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":53450997039471,"sku":"82521014827323307296","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":53450997072239,"sku":"65792766733995988360","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ 3XL","offer_id":53450997105007,"sku":"28302770423778520146","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":53450997137775,"sku":"30537916085310178558","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":53450997170543,"sku":"29278415209086956703","price":34.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0965\/5468\/0687\/files\/01_stay_unbothered_front_hero_v01.jpg?v=1788924791"},{"product_id":"the-executive-t-rex-species-file-mug-funny-office-mug-11oz","title":"The Executive T-Rex Species File Mug – Funny Office Mug, 11oz","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis two-sided 11oz white ceramic mug has Executive T-Rex on one side and its Species File on the other. It is a funny Secret Santa gift idea for a coworker, with free US shipping.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eYour manager has been officially classified.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMeet The Executive T-Rex: maximum authority, limited processing capacity.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSome workplace behaviors are difficult to explain. The Executive T-Rex is not.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eOne side features the Executive T-Rex in an office state: suited up, coffee in hand, and confidently unsure what is happening.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eTurn the mug around for the official Species File:\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWARNING: 1.44 MB Processing Capacity.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHigh volume, zero logic.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePart of the Innermon Species File Collection, this two-sided 11oz office mug documents one of the Corporate Bestiary's most recognizable management species with the seriousness it deserves.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eA useful desk companion and a funny gift for coworkers, bosses, managers, work besties, Secret Santa exchanges, White Elephant gifts, or anyone who has survived a meeting led by an Executive T-Rex.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eProduct highlights\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eTwo-sided design — The Executive T-Rex character on one side and the official Species File diagnosis on the other.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eOriginal Innermon character artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e11oz white ceramic office mug.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDeadpan workplace humor for desks, coffee breaks, and questionable meetings.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eA funny gift for coworkers, bosses, managers, work besties, Secret Santa, White Elephant, birthdays, promotions, and office farewells.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePart of the Innermon Species File Collection.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSold individually: one 11oz mug. Gallery images show both sides of the same mug; scene props are not included.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"11oz","offer_id":53454689698159,"sku":"30560783088966392602","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0965\/5468\/0687\/files\/01_boss_dino_character_hero_v01.jpg?v=1788995303"},{"product_id":"parrot-species-file-mug-corporate-jargon-funny-coworker-gift-11oz","title":"Copycat Parrot Species File Mug – Corporate Jargon \u0026 Funny Coworker Gift, 11oz","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis two-sided 11oz white ceramic mug has Copycat Parrot on one side and its Species File on the other. It makes a funny Secret Santa gift for coworkers, with free US shipping.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFor the coworker who can repeat the strategy before anyone understands it.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAlignment achieved. Original thought still pending.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSome office species adapt by solving problems. Others adapt by learning exactly what management said five minutes ago.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMeet the Copycat Parrot.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eOne side of this two-sided 11oz mug features the suited Innermon Parrot in full professional plumage.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eTurn it around for the official Species File:\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRepeats management language with remarkable confidence.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eOriginal thought: Not detected.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePart of the Innermon Species File Collection, this mug is a dry little tribute to corporate buzzwords, enthusiastic agreement, and the mysterious ability to say exactly what leadership already said — but louder.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIdeal for Secret Santa, White Elephant, office birthdays, coworker gifts, or the colleague who has never met a phrase like “strategic alignment” they couldn't reuse.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eProduct highlights\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eTwo-sided design — Copycat Parrot on one side and the official Species File on the other.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eOriginal hand-drawn Innermon character artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e11oz white ceramic office mug.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCorporate jargon and workplace buzzword humor.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eA funny gift for coworkers, office friends, Secret Santa, White Elephant, and workplace gift exchanges.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePart of the Innermon Species File Collection.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSold individually: one 11oz mug. Gallery images show both sides of the same mug; scene props are not included.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"11oz","offer_id":53454692614511,"sku":"16843406681574471604","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0965\/5468\/0687\/files\/01_parrot_character_hero_v01.jpg?v=1788995595"},{"product_id":"sloth-species-file-mug-pending-approval-office-coworker-gift-11oz","title":"Sloth Species File Mug – Pending Approval Office \u0026 Coworker Gift, 11oz","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis two-sided 11oz white ceramic mug has Approval Sloth on one side and its Species File on the other. It is a funny option for an office gift exchange, with free US shipping.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eYour office approval request has been received. Please allow 7–10 business eternities.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMeet the species protecting the organization from unnecessary speed.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eEvery organization needs controls. Some controls are policies. Some are approvals. Some appear to be a Sloth holding your request indefinitely.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMeet the Approval Sloth.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eOne side of this two-sided 11oz mug features the Innermon Sloth in its natural professional state.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eTurn it around for the official Species File:\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAll requests remain pending until properly reviewed.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSpeed is considered a control function.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePart of the Innermon Species File Collection, this mug turns the familiar pain of approvals, reviews, sign-offs, finance checks, and compliance gates into a completely legitimate operational philosophy.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eA fitting gift for coworkers, managers, finance teams, compliance teams, approval gatekeepers, Secret Santa exchanges, or anyone currently waiting for someone to “circle back.”\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eProduct highlights\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eTwo-sided design — Approval Sloth on one side and the official Species File on the other.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eOriginal hand-drawn Innermon character artwork.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e11oz white ceramic office mug.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eOffice bureaucracy, finance, compliance, and approval humor.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eA funny gift for coworkers, managers, finance teams, compliance teams, Secret Santa, and office gifts.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePart of the Innermon Species File Collection.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSold individually: one 11oz mug. Gallery images show both sides of the same mug; scene props are not included.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"11oz","offer_id":53454697103727,"sku":"31000252059436000121","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0965\/5468\/0687\/files\/01_sloth_character_hero_v01.jpg?v=1788995789"},{"product_id":"soul-expired-at-9-am-snail-t-shirt-funny-office-graphic-tee","title":"Soul Expired at 9 AM Snail T-Shirt — Funny Office Graphic Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThis 100% Airlume cotton graphic tee features Corporate Snail’s “Soul Expired at 9 AM” front print and is available in White, Black, Natural, or Navy in sizes S–3XL. It makes a funny Secret Santa gift for coworkers, with free US shipping.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAttendance: confirmed. Soul: unavailable.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe workday has barely started. Your expression has already filed its report.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eA tired Snail, a cup of coffee, and \u003cstrong\u003eSoul Expired at 9 AM\u003c\/strong\u003e — a front-print graphic for mornings that ask a little too much, a little too early.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePart of the Innermon office-survival world, this is the more exhausted counterpart to Stay Unbothered. Same shell. Same responsibilities. Different kind of morning.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFor yourself, or the work friend who needs no explanation.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eProduct details\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront-only graphic print.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eBella+Canvas 3001 blank with a retail fit, side seams, shoulder tape, and tear-away label.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton; solid color, not heather.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront DTG print workflow.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAvailable in White, Natural, Black, and Navy.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSizes S, M, L, XL, 2XL, and 3XL.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003ch3\u003eSize guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cp\u003eMeasurements are garment dimensions laid flat. 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It has been pending since Q2.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eProduct details\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront-only graphic print.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eBella+Canvas 3001 blank with a retail fit, side seams, shoulder tape, and tear-away label.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton; solid color, not heather.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront DTG print workflow.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAvailable in White and Natural.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSizes S, M, L, XL, 2XL, and 3XL.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003ch3\u003eSize guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cp\u003eMeasurements are garment dimensions laid flat. 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Front row for the applause.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eProduct details\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront-only graphic print.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eBella+Canvas 3001 blank with a retail fit, side seams, shoulder tape, and tear-away label.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e100% Airlume combed and ring-spun cotton; solid color, not heather.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFront DTG print workflow.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eAvailable in White and Natural.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSizes S, M, L, XL, 2XL, and 3XL.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003ch3\u003eSize guide\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cp\u003eMeasurements are garment dimensions laid flat. 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